330 Eats Creampuff

Discussion in 'Archive Management' started by Kid97GTS, Sep 6, 2001.

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  1. Kid97GTS

    Kid97GTS Enthusiast

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    Yesterday the road course at Willow Springs (aka "The Fastest Track in the West") was witness to empirical proof of the creaminess of the '00-01 creampuffs. Several Vipers gathered for a track day with the Impala club (Verrrrrry nice attitude and lots of track time), along with various other cars, including a showroom stock BMW 330i.

    Well, the little 330 was parked next to the Red Witch (550 Maranello) in the paddock, and apparently the 5-5-0 was whispering in the little guy's ear about the notorious creaminess of the wimpy cammed late model Gen II's, such that by the afternoon session the 330's ~220 hp 6 banger was raring to get a piece of the big bad creampuff (which by the way, was also sporting a certain upgrade header/exhaust package supposedly good for 50 hp).

    Next thing you know the 330 was worked its way through traffic and gets the creamdog in its sights. Despite the best efforts of the poor creampuff, the 330 climbed up its ace and broke off a piece so big that ole' creamy won't be walking straight for a few days. It reminded me of one of the scenes from those wildlife shows when the proud (slow) elephant is taken down by a pack of dogs. Don't get me wrong, it wasn't the Viper driver's fault - he was putting up respectable lap times (for a creampuff) - it was the car, Mars!

    And I don't want to hear anything about how "Oh, it's the driver," and "Gee, a good driver in a Miata can beat a Viper on a given day," blah, blah, blah! Fact remains, the '97 Big Boy that sleeps next to the little "330 That Could" has never, and would never, be taken down by the little grocery getter. SCOREBOARD. Face facts, Viper Nation, the Creampuffs are full of cream waiting to be lapped up by some Euro with sport suspension. Just a friendly word of warning - don't go into a gunfight at the Willow Springs Corral with a holster full of cream, or you too might have a little hitch in your giddee-up for a couple days.
     
  2. RickV2K

    RickV2K Enthusiast

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    lol.......i got your creampuff right here boy.
     
  3. PMUM

    PMUM Enthusiast

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    Oh C'mon, we all know you were cheating! Rumor has it that the lil' 330i was balanced and blueprinted, had an extra passenger that was leaning into the corners like a sidecar monkey to help in the sweepers and the all-season Aquatreads were dipped in Super Glue.

    There's no way the cam in my old '98 Viper would've EVER let something like that happen to it! If that '98 cam ever saw a 330i coming by the car it would jump out, give the 330i the business and go have it's way with an '01 cam before getting back in the '98.
     
  4. VIPERESS

    VIPERESS Enthusiast

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    Driver error [​IMG]
    Laura
     
  5. SoCal Rebell

    SoCal Rebell Enthusiast

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    ROTFLMAO!!!!!!!!!
     
  6. PMUM

    PMUM Enthusiast

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    Viperess, how dare you insult that driver? He is a pillar in the community that I hope to live in someday! He's 'spread' cheer to many people and is a mentor that inspires me daily!

    Sincerely,
    PMUM

    (I sure hope he sees this post)
     
  7. VIPERESS

    VIPERESS Enthusiast

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    <BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by PMUM:
    Viperess, how dare you insult that driver? He is a pillar in the community that I hope to live in someday! He's 'spread' cheer to many people and is a mentor that inspires me daily!

    Sincerely,
    PMUM

    (I sure hope he sees this post)

    <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

    PMUM,
    Do you need someone to pull you out??
    Sincerely,
    Creampuff Owner
     
  8. K Adelberg

    K Adelberg Enthusiast

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    Hey, rumor has it this was the same driver that had four people in his CLK Benz at a Viper Days event at Buttonwillow blowing by none creamy Vipers. So, Kid was that you in the same car that got lapped by me in my Creampuff?
    Oh whatever, this is just a glossy way of saying you need someone else to show you the worthiness of your car. Although I do agree with the cream cheese version of the later edition of the Viper V10, even Mumford in the BMW is no match for my beastly creampuff. So go eat you schnitzel!!!
     
  9. RoyV101621

    RoyV101621 Viper Owner

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    So what separates the men from the boys?
    Is the BMW's I-6 cam longer and bumpier than the V-10?
    It's not the size of the cam but the texture?
    <BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>
    And I don't want to hear anything about how "Oh, it's the driver," and "Gee, a good driver in a Miata can beat a Viper on a given day," blah, blah, blah! Fact remains, the '97 Big Boy that sleeps next to the little "330
    <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>
    Did PMUM show Kid96GTS the proper line?
    We know these question can't be answered here. Sent me the video in a plain paper wrapper.
     
  10. ronviper

    ronviper Enthusiast

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    Kid97GTS I see where you got the name Kid from, you behave like a child that never learns nothing no matter what the facts show. What you need is your diaper changed and a soother in your mouth.
     
  11. Mike Brunton

    Mike Brunton Enthusiast

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    Oh come on Ron...

    Kid is a funny guy - I'd MUCH rather read humorous stories on this board than let us turn into a bunch of guys stroking our egos about our cars.

    Do "creampuffs" dyno lower than previous year Vipers? I dunno... I've read about some strong ones, and read about some weak ones. No 96-99 GTS is making 380 at the wheels... but I think it's a break in issue.

    Then again, what do I know... I am breaking the laws of physics with my 120MPH trap speeds when I only make 410RWHP [​IMG]
     
  12. SoCal Rebell

    SoCal Rebell Enthusiast

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    <BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by PMUM:
    Viperess, how dare you insult that driver? He is a pillar in the community that I hope to live in someday! He's 'spread' cheer to many people and is a mentor that inspires me daily!

    Sincerely,
    PMUM

    (I sure hope he sees this post)

    <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

    Paul, Candy says "Hi Pauly", race car drivers get her hot.
     
  13. Kid97GTS

    Kid97GTS Enthusiast

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    <BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by ronviper:
    Kid97GTS I see where you got the name Kid from, you behave like a child that never learns nothing no matter what the facts show. What you need is your diaper changed and a soother in your mouth.

    <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

    Hmmm, Ron, let me break it down yet again for you:

    Fact: every Creampuff era Viper I have witnessed dyno'ed came in lower than a similarly equipped '96-99. Although I have heard of the Creampuffs EQUALING (not surpassing) the 96-99's, it seems that these are overachieving Creampuffs doing their best just to rise to the level of the older cars.

    Fact: every Creampuff I have seen or heard of has not achieved the same gains from similar breathing mods, such as headers and cat delete.

    Fact: I have never lost to a Creampuff.

    Fact: I have never lost to a BMW 330i.

    Fact: Creampuffs have lost to my Big Boy and the aforementioned 330.

    Fact: I will be happy to wheel out Big Boy (or maybe even the 330, if you prefer) and put my big cam, errrr soother in your Creampuff's mouth. Maybe SoCal can even film it and include in one of his "Box Sets."
     
  14. Kid97GTS

    Kid97GTS Enthusiast

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    <BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by SoCal Rebell:
    Paul, Candy says "Hi Pauly", race car drivers get her hot.

    <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

    I want Candy.
     
  15. SapphireGTS

    SapphireGTS Enthusiast

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    I see. Thats fine. I got creamed in an 1300 HP Prostreet Camaro.

    I guess he would make me a creame puff as he would you.

    Its all relative.

    My car isnt the fastest on the planet neither is any of ours. I just have fun driveing it.

    I get my gratification out of other things besides my cars cam shaft.

    [​IMG]
     
  16. SapphireGTS

    SapphireGTS Enthusiast

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    I forgot to mention my car brakes better than a G1 car. So there [​IMG].
     
  17. Chuck 98 RT/10

    Chuck 98 RT/10 VCA Venom Member-Midsouth

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    <BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Kid97GTS:
    the wimpy cam DC switched to in response to yuppie owners complaining about the somewhat rumpety-rump characteristics of the prior cam (the man's cam).

    <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

    I agree with this part!

    DC are you reading???
     
  18. Matt M PA

    Matt M PA Enthusiast

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    This is getting ridiculous. The reason that 2000 and newer Viper have revised engine internals is for emissions. Did everyone get that? Emissions. The cars are REQUIRED by law to have knock sensors that detect knock at idle. The older engines could not do this because to the nasty idle. (I had a '96 and loved the idle, by the way) By revising the cam, the knock sensors could function...PER THE LAW. The pistons also allowed for slightly better cold start-up emissions, as well as less reciprocating mass. Less reciprocating mass can only help power. Also,we were told at the plant that cars built since '98 have much better exhaust manifolds, this also would help. As I said before, if the newer engines dyno so differently than previous cars...DC would be in trouble....like Ford with the '99 Cobra.
     
  19. Venom Lover

    Venom Lover Enthusiast

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    Matt,
    DC would be in trouble only if the '00 and '01 cars failed to meet the 450 bhp claim. It appears the '96-'99s were seriously underrated, whereas the '00s and '01s come in closer to the claim. Of course there are exceptions, but it seems like so many '97s dyno'd at 415-425 rwhp stock vs. lower 400s for the '00s and '01s.

    Oh, I like candy too, but SloCal didn't bring enough to share....
     
  20. RickV2K

    RickV2K Enthusiast

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    ease up folks...the boy is only trying to get your danders up. i think he knows that just about anyone here could go out and buy a 330, a (used) 97 gen II, gen III, vette or any other car that could perform the way he thinks a car should perform. if i wanted a used 97....i'd go out and buy one.....eh? instead i wanted a brand new shiney 2000 RT/10. come to think of it....isn't he the kid that made some un-cool comment about some fella's wife pictured on the hood of his car with little on? you gotta get a grip on life boy.
    [​IMG]
     
  21. ronviper

    ronviper Enthusiast

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    Kid you are licked Matt and others know the facts, as for racing my cream puff i would be happy to show you my tail lights anytime. I am sure it will send you back to mama crying and pouting like a spoiled brat.
     
  22. Kid97GTS

    Kid97GTS Enthusiast

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    <BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by RickV2K:
    ease up folks...the boy is only trying to get your danders up. i think he knows that just about anyone here could go out and buy a 330, a (used) 97 gen II, gen III, vette or any other car that could perform the way he thinks a car should perform. if i wanted a used 97....i'd go out and buy one.....eh? instead i wanted a brand new shiney 2000 RT/10. come to think of it....isn't he the kid that made some un-cool comment about some fella's wife pictured on the hood of his car with little on? you gotta get a grip on life boy.
    [​IMG]
    <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

    Actually, I said that although the guy's wife may not have had a large rack, she was still cute, and didn't need bolt-ons. As far as trying to provoke a particular response, I think you are reading more into the posts than is there. Simply put, I am convinced the '00 and later cars are down on power when compared to the earlier Gen II's. Regardless of the reason, I think this is a pretty objective point.

    I know people get a little irritated when they think they didn't buy the best, get the best deal, etc., but that shouldn't cloud a discussion of the objective performance of the cars. Obviously, some owners (like Rick in the above post) aren't necessarily obsessed with having the most powerful or raciest car they can buy (as made obvious by the R/T choice), and are completely satisfied with a car that is maybe 10-20 hp off the older version, but comes with more creature comforts. Good for you, but don't try to invalidate the "Creampuff" argument by saying "Oh yeah, well DC had a good reason for making the changes," or "Just look at "X" creampuff in "Y" state - it had good numbers on the dyno, so all creampuffs must be o.k." Funny part is, the people that actually have spent the most wheel time and worked on the two iterations of the Gen II are pretty much in agreement that the earlier car GENERALLY has more power out of the box and responds much better to breathing mods.
     
  23. SapphireGTS

    SapphireGTS Enthusiast

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    Oh yeah. My dad can beat up your dad. [​IMG]
     
  24. Kid97GTS

    Kid97GTS Enthusiast

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    JMcNeck - Well, if you'd prefer a verbal thrashing in getting my point across, I'd be happy to oblige, especially since Vipermad has apparently given me license to dole out beat downs as I see fit in this thread. So come on, McNeck, ronviper and the rest of the clowns looking for some "Kid Love" - the line forms on the right. If you want to turn a discussion about the RELATIVE lack of power present in the newer Gen II's into some sort of smack clinic, I'll put on my professor outfit and ring the school bell. You want some - you got it.

    Only problem is, we seem to have been down this road before. You know - the one where you say something dumb, I come in and give you a good rap on the knuckles while actually making a relevant point, you spend a good four hours flipping through the dictionary looking for words containing more than two syllables to include in your reply, and then I finish you off with a haymaker, at which point various other parties may choose to pile on and the thread gets closed. So, in the interest of not taxing your wit to its meltdown point (see the Serious Eric and IEAT debacles), lets just assume that until you actually have a point relevant to the discussion at hand, i.e., Creampuffs, you have been banished to that corner of the room where all the miscreants pout once the Kid is forced to publicly ridicule them for their weak takes and even weaker attempts to bang the Kid.
     
  25. Gerald

    Gerald Enthusiast

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    Don't see why all of you people take a little humor and twist it around. I guess if your not born with a little humor instilled in ya', you'll never learn it.

    DO NOT provoke the best smack talker of all time (KID)

    I bow to thee, KID..


    Gerald
     
  26. RickV2K

    RickV2K Enthusiast

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    lol......best smack talker? ok....ok....ok. kid and his cronies win. you guys are too awesome. i'm gonna go out and buy a nice used 96 or 97 with awesome power. now.....what color would you smack talkers suggest as the all round bestest awesomest color?
     
  27. BWoodbury

    BWoodbury Enthusiast

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    <BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>
    DO NOT provoke the best smack talker of all time (KID)
    <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

    I've learned that leason the hard way!

    <BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>
    I bow to thee, KID..
    <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

    Not quite ready to go there yet...

    Proud owner of a Big Boy Viper! For the best color just look to your left...
     
  28. XS TORQ

    XS TORQ Enthusiast

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    This is so funny I can barely stand it.
    Kid ROCKS
     
  29. RickV2K

    RickV2K Enthusiast

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    question......just what is smack talk? i thought we were just pokin a little fun here. you guys are takin this smack....jive...trash-talk or whatever it's called stuff a little too personal. ease up fellas. kid is harmless. let him have his fun. i'd hate to see you guys in a 9-ball game for the big bucks.
     
  30. Chuck 98 RT/10

    Chuck 98 RT/10 VCA Venom Member-Midsouth

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    <BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Kid97GTS:
    looking for some "Kid Love" - the line forms on the right.
    <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

    I knew it! I knew it all along! Kid is from San Fransico!
     
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