VIPER BAZ UK
Enthusiast
I reckon most of these apply to you.....
>How to tell if you have to much horsepower:
1.The Emissions test guy starts laughing as soon as you pull in for an MOT.
2.You can,t drive your Car in the Rain.
3.Your significant other is afraid to drive your Car
4.You are afraid to drive your Car
5.You spend more on Tyres than on Food
6.You spend more on Insurance than on House payments
7.You look in a local Police Car and see a picture of your Car taped to the Dash.
8.You throw your Underwear in the Dustbin rather than use them
again.
9.You have to go to a Track to buy Petrol.
10.Your mechanic names the new wing of his garage after you.
11.Jaques Villeneuve and Micheal Schumacher wave you by.
12.You can make the Kessel Run in less than 12 parsecs.
13.You,re tempted to wear your Fire suit just to drive to the Office.
14.Red signal Lights shift to Green as you are approaching then shift back to Red as you pass.
15.You arrive somewhere before you left.
16.You get pulled over for doing 155 in a 30 but the Cops will let
you go if they can look under the Bonnet.
17.You remove £1000 of Stereo system to save 6lb of weight.
18.You are not allowed on any Track Days.
19.You get an anonymous call asking if you are interested in being in the Cannonball run.
20.Your face looks like you are riding a NASA cetrifuge when you drive the Car.
21.You need Parachute Braking.
22.Your significant other won,t even ride in your car.
23.There is no possible way to sneak out of your neighborhood at 6am.
24.Your pets scramble for their hiding spots as soon as the garage door is opened. (pets and all the Neighbours)
25.Family Photos throughout the House are replaced with life-sized posters of your car.
26.Fuel is delivered to your Home in 55 Gallon Drums.
27.You carry Earplugs in your car, doesn,t everybody???
28.The only spot on the car which receives cleaning is the Windscreen. What else is there to clean?
29.You find out that Wing Mirrors don,t hold up at speeds exceeding 180 mph.
30.Young children cling to their Mums in fear when you come around the corner.
31.Birds fall out of their nests from the rumble of your 5" dual Exhaust.
32.All the major Tyre makers are sending you free slicks in hopes of an endorsement deal.
33.The Citylink guy took to taking steroids so he could keep up with you,re Shipments.
34. The Parcelforce guy had a nervous breakdown
35.All the wildlife within a 800ft radius around your House got the Hellout!
36.The nearest Geological Seismic Surveying Station Operator knows your address by heart.
37.As passengers get into your Car you tell them " there,s a whole Seat there but you,ll only need the edge!"
38.The Earth slows in rotation when you put on your new Slicks and head east.
39.You have to Glue you,re Slicks to the Wheels.
40.Your Exhaust pipes are larger in diameter than your Drive Shaft.
41.Your fuel pump flows enough to water a Golf course.
42.Your compression is so high you could run Diesel fuel.
43.The Sparks from your Wheelie bars start Grass fires on the side of the road.
44.Your Engine idles at 2800rpm.
45.You measure the Fuel you use in Gallons per mile.
>How to tell if you have to much horsepower:
1.The Emissions test guy starts laughing as soon as you pull in for an MOT.
2.You can,t drive your Car in the Rain.
3.Your significant other is afraid to drive your Car
4.You are afraid to drive your Car
5.You spend more on Tyres than on Food
6.You spend more on Insurance than on House payments
7.You look in a local Police Car and see a picture of your Car taped to the Dash.
8.You throw your Underwear in the Dustbin rather than use them
again.
9.You have to go to a Track to buy Petrol.
10.Your mechanic names the new wing of his garage after you.
11.Jaques Villeneuve and Micheal Schumacher wave you by.
12.You can make the Kessel Run in less than 12 parsecs.
13.You,re tempted to wear your Fire suit just to drive to the Office.
14.Red signal Lights shift to Green as you are approaching then shift back to Red as you pass.
15.You arrive somewhere before you left.
16.You get pulled over for doing 155 in a 30 but the Cops will let
you go if they can look under the Bonnet.
17.You remove £1000 of Stereo system to save 6lb of weight.
18.You are not allowed on any Track Days.
19.You get an anonymous call asking if you are interested in being in the Cannonball run.
20.Your face looks like you are riding a NASA cetrifuge when you drive the Car.
21.You need Parachute Braking.
22.Your significant other won,t even ride in your car.
23.There is no possible way to sneak out of your neighborhood at 6am.
24.Your pets scramble for their hiding spots as soon as the garage door is opened. (pets and all the Neighbours)
25.Family Photos throughout the House are replaced with life-sized posters of your car.
26.Fuel is delivered to your Home in 55 Gallon Drums.
27.You carry Earplugs in your car, doesn,t everybody???
28.The only spot on the car which receives cleaning is the Windscreen. What else is there to clean?
29.You find out that Wing Mirrors don,t hold up at speeds exceeding 180 mph.
30.Young children cling to their Mums in fear when you come around the corner.
31.Birds fall out of their nests from the rumble of your 5" dual Exhaust.
32.All the major Tyre makers are sending you free slicks in hopes of an endorsement deal.
33.The Citylink guy took to taking steroids so he could keep up with you,re Shipments.
34. The Parcelforce guy had a nervous breakdown
35.All the wildlife within a 800ft radius around your House got the Hellout!
36.The nearest Geological Seismic Surveying Station Operator knows your address by heart.
37.As passengers get into your Car you tell them " there,s a whole Seat there but you,ll only need the edge!"
38.The Earth slows in rotation when you put on your new Slicks and head east.
39.You have to Glue you,re Slicks to the Wheels.
40.Your Exhaust pipes are larger in diameter than your Drive Shaft.
41.Your fuel pump flows enough to water a Golf course.
42.Your compression is so high you could run Diesel fuel.
43.The Sparks from your Wheelie bars start Grass fires on the side of the road.
44.Your Engine idles at 2800rpm.
45.You measure the Fuel you use in Gallons per mile.
